17. The Six Phases of Your New Job

This has been around for a while, but it is still funny!

 Phase 1

You are listening to Jazz

Your first day at work is great...

Your co-workers are wonderful.

Your office is cute.

You love your boss.

 Phase 2

You are listening to
Pop music

After a while,

you are so busy,

you are not sure

if you're coming or going.

 Phase 3

You are listening to
Heavy Metal

This is what happens after about SIX Months!

 Phase 4

You are listening to
Hip Hop

You've become bloated due to stress.

You're gaining weight due to lack of exercise.

You feel sluggish and suffer from constipation.

Your co-workers are too cheerful for your liking, and
the walls of your cubicle are
closing in.

 Phase 5

You are listening to
GANGSTA RAP

After more time passes, your eyes start to twitch.

You forget what a 'good hair day' feels like.

You just fall out of bed and load up on caffeine.

 Phase 6

You are listening to the voices in your head

You have locked the office door to keep people out.

You wonder WHY am I even here in the first place, and WHY did I come to work today!